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Hey kids, it’s the Oldsmobile lineup circa 1999, and it’s here to say: work hard, stay in school, don’t do drugs except weed, and never trust the police!

I Sold My Landlord A Deathtrap And I Feel Horrible I Sold My Landlord A Deathtrap And I Feel Horrible

When I traded my beautifully-driving $1 Oldsmobile Alero to my landlord for his totaled 2003 Kia Rio, I thought I was giving him the deal of the century. But last night, he came knocking on my door to deliver some scary news: his brakes went out.

Today is America’s birthday, and so your hardworking Jalopnik staff is taking a little time off to grill meat, drink High Life and contemplate the Oldsmobile Toronado. We suggest you do the same, but even if you don’t, we have a day of posts ready for your perusal. You’re welcome.

At $3,900, Could This 1999 Olds Aurora Be An Awe Inspiring Sight? At $3,900, Could This 1999 Olds Aurora Be An Awe Inspiring Sight?

A famous Simpson’s episode had Principal Skinner passing off a kitchen fire as the Aurora Borealis, to humorous effect. No such chicanery is necessary with today’s Nice Price or Crack Pipe Olds Aurora, though its price might still prove delightfully devilish.

Watching Thick White Wall Tires Bend Through An Autocross Is Deeply Fascinating

One of my favorite camera views in racing is the tire view that shows big Formula One tires flex and wobble through turns and over curbs. Thankfully, the amateur version of this is just as fascinating. Look at how much these Oldsmobile white walls flex at an autocross!

Oldsmobile And Pontiac Are Dead But Their Websites Live On Oldsmobile And Pontiac Are Dead But Their Websites Live On

General Motors may have shuttered the doors of Oldsmobile and Pontiac, but on the internet, the brands can never die.

When you desire performance, but you need to show you’ve got some class as well, there is but one way to go: Oldsmobile SportOmega.

Meh Car Monday: The Last Oldsmobile Cutlass Was The Dullest Blade Meh Car Monday: The Last Oldsmobile Cutlass Was The Dullest Blade

I know it sometimes feels like I pick on GM a lot for these meh car articles, but they just did such a stellar job at making some truly dull, forgettable automobiles. It’s a talent, really. A terrible, terrible talent. If you start feeling some pity for GM, then I’m going to implore you to jam a syringe of adrenaline…

I Just Traded My $1 Oldsmobile For A Terrible 2003 Kia Rio  I Just Traded My $1 Oldsmobile For A Terrible 2003 Kia Rio 

I never thought I’d say these words: I now own a 2003 Kia Rio. And my god is it a gigantic pile of garbage that I will thoroughly enjoy destroying in an upcoming video series. But first, the thing has to somehow survive winter-beater duty.

My $1 Oldsmobile Kicked Ass On A 1,400-Mile Trip And Now I'm In Love With A Boring Car My $1 Oldsmobile Kicked Ass On A 1,400-Mile Trip And Now I'm In Love With A Boring Car

Last month, I bought a dilapidated 2001 Oldsmobile Alero for one (1) dollar. After getting this relic of a bygone General Motors era up and running, I put it to the test this past weekend with 1,400 miles of crowded, pre-Thanksgiving American interstate. Now I think I might be in love.

These Hosers Destroyed An Oldsmobile Alero So We Didn't Have To

The Oldsmobile Alero is all but the definition of a “regular car.” It’s bland. It’s inoffensive. It will get you from Point A to Point B just fine. It can also do burnouts and sweet jumps if you’re quite bored. SEND IT!

I'm Taking My $1 Oldsmobile Alero On A 1,400 Mile Thanksgiving Road Trip; Pray For Me I'm Taking My $1 Oldsmobile Alero On A 1,400 Mile Thanksgiving Road Trip; Pray For Me

I don’t know how this happened, but my $1 Oldsmobile Alero—with its unknown service history and only recent “running” status after 11 months in a coma—is now my best car. As such, I’m taking it on a 1,400 mile road trip. God I hope I don’t have to celebrate Thanksgiving on the shoulder of a Pennsylvania interstate.

A 1978 Oldsmobile Holiday 88 Autocrossing Is Both Glacial And Palatial

Even if your car isn’t competitive, you should whip your ride around an autocross course at least once. Test its limits in a safe, open lot! Anyone can show up in a Miata or an S2000, but unlikely autocross cars are often the most fun to watch, as this 1978 Oldsmobile Holiday 88 demonstrates in the broughamiest way…

Front-Wheel Drive Into Luxury With An Oldsmobile Aurora Front-Wheel Drive Into Luxury With An Oldsmobile Aurora

Oldsmobile’s product lineup was pretty drab in the 1990s. There was the ubiquitous Cutlass Ciera, the Blazer-based Bravada, the last gasps of the Toronado and a litany of forgettable luxury cars that are forever lost to the sands of time. Finally, in 1995, Oldsmobile introduced a new flagship intended to take the…

Why I'm Trading My $1 Oldsmobile For A Totaled 2003 Kia Rio Why I'm Trading My $1 Oldsmobile For A Totaled 2003 Kia Rio

A few weeks ago, I bought a 2001 Oldsmobile Alero for $1 from a friend who just wanted the non-running junker out of her driveway. My plan was to destroy the car in an upcoming video series, but those plans have now changed; I’ve decided to trade the N-Body sedan for a ruined 2003 Kia Rio.

Try To Forget The 1985 Oldsmobile Calais Try To Forget The 1985 Oldsmobile Calais

Help me. I cannot stop thinking about the Oldsmobile Calais. I accidentally watched an advertisement for the car and Oldsmobile’s compact coupe has lodged itself into my brain.

This Violent Wheelie Contest Crash Was The Worst Surprise Ever

One run at Byron Dragway’s World Power Wheel Standing Championship—which delightfully is a real thing that exists—went very wrong for driver Jason Schubert. Schubert’s 1987 Oldsmobile Cutlass veered off-course and into the wall, tumbling several times after the hit.

My $1 Oldsmobile Might Be The Best Car In My Fleet But I Still Have To Destroy It My $1 Oldsmobile Might Be The Best Car In My Fleet But I Still Have To Destroy It

I bought my $1 Oldsmobile because I needed a sacrificial vehicle for a diabolical project I have planned. The problem is, after getting this Alero’s “Quad 4" engine running beautifully last weekend, I’m having second thoughts. Should I destroy what might be the best vehicle in my fleet?

I Just Bought This 2001 Oldsmobile Alero For $1 I Just Bought This 2001 Oldsmobile Alero For $1

New to my fleet is a 2001 Oldsmobile Alero that I purchased for the price of one of those tree-shaped air fresheners. While it might seem like an unusual purchase considering my affinity for old Jeeps, The $1 Oldsmobile has one key trait that helps it fit right in with the rest of my collection: it doesn’t work (and…

How did this Oldsmobile Alero end up on a scenic beach? It believed in itself. Take on the work week like an Oldsmobile Alero would!

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